The Calm State
What Horses Can Teach Us About Regulation
Being calm doesn’t mean feeling nothing or staying still.
A calm state is when our body feels more settled, our breathing slows, and our energy feels easier to manage. Horses show us that calm is something we move toward and return to, again and again.
Knowing what calms or unsettles us gives us more choice. When we are calm, we can think more clearly and feel safer in our bodies.
Horses don’t force calm. They move their bodies, breathe out, notice their surroundings, express what they feel, seek support when helpful, and then settle again. We can learn from this natural wisdom and practise ways to return to a more regulated state.
Steps to Regulation
1. Tense and Release
Horses often move their bodies to release excess energy before settling. You can do the same by gently squeezing and releasing your muscles. Try your arms or legs, hold briefly, then let go.
2. Outbreath
Horses use their out-breath to release tension. You may notice sighing, chewing, or licking of the lips.
Try taking three slow breaths out, letting your body soften each time.
4. Sensing the Environment
Horses have acute senses and notice what is happening around them. This helps them stay present.
We can practise noticing our environment using 5-4-3-2-1:
5 things you can see
4 things you can feel
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
Take a moment to observe your surroundings and notice what is present.
3. Grounding
As the breath leaves the body, energy tends to move downward. Horses stay connected through their feet to the ground. Notice your weight and how your feet connect with the ground beneath you.
5. Expressing Feelings
Horses naturally express emotions like anger, fear, joy, or sadness so they do not hold onto the emotion. They notice, respond or share, release the emotion, and then settle again - often returning to grazing. We can do the same by communicating what we feel to a safe person — or using a safe way to release energy — and then noticing how our body settles afterwards.
6. Resourcing
Horses sometimes seek calm through support from trusted herd members, or through quiet time alone.
We can do the same by reflecting on or going to what helps us feel calmer — it could be a trusted person, an animal, or something in your surroundings you noticed as you did 5-4-3-2-1. Notice how your body feels as you connect with what supports your calm.
Remember…
Calm is not about control or staying still.
Calm comes from awareness, movement, breath, grounding, sensing, expression, and resourcing — and it’s something we can return to, again and again.
Adapted from the EAAPI Horse Wisdom Program ®